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A pick 'n' mix genre author. "I'm not greedy. I just like variety."

Friday, 27 March 2015

Where I'm at... in life and with my WIP

So, I wanted to let you all know where I'm at. I feel that for the last few weeks I've been kinda quiet.... Okay, when I say quiet I mean on social media, not so much here on my blog which I very rarely blog on.

Firstly, I want to apologize that this blog has become more of a hangout where I feature other authors. I'm not sorry for having guest authors over, because personally I have found a lot of the books that are pimped on here interesting and have added them to my TBR pile. I am sorry that I'm not blogging enough about my own books, and the reason for that will tie in with what I am going to say below.

If you follow me on social media - Facebook, Goodreads, TSU or Twitter - apart from my posting links to guest authors you may - or may not - have noticed I've been rather quiet the last few weeks; not that I have ever been an author who posts constantly, but I don't know, I feel I haven't really been around the last few weeks and the reason for that is that I've had to do a lot of thinking about my life; what I want, what I don't want, what I think would be best for me at this point in time and I think I have figured stuff out, but it has kinda exhausted me, which is why I haven't been "around."

I'm an over thinker. It isn't healthy. It isn't always necessary, but I tend to go over and over things in my head. The decisions I have had to make recently aren't even drastic or huge decisions, but naturally they are the beginning of the process of change, and I think we all tend to get into a daily routine, we become comfortable with our situation, and sometimes - or at least with me - I become overly aware of that change. Does that make sense?

Once upon a time I had a dream. It was a big dream or well, my big dream. I kept this dream and worked at it all the way until the age of 18 and then I fell out of love with zed dream, and turned my attention to a smaller dream. I've worked hard at this smaller dream and love it, and I don't regret the way I have spent the last nine years of my life, but part of me has always longed for my big dream and it has taken me until this point in time to see that I have been scared, and have doubted myself, my talent, abilities and even my appearance and character. I have believed this dream to be impossible, which is stupid, because nothing is impossible if you are willing to work for it. I have settled for the routine that I have fallen into and I'm unhappy. I have depression. I hate saying it because people look at you as if you're wanting pity, or attention, or just saying it as an excuse, and they don't understand. I hate the way I feel most days. I hate the way I feel when I'm depressed; how much a part of me wants to give up because I can't cope. I have depression and it ruins things in ways that I never even thought possible. Part of me believes I've never followed my heart because of fear, but also because of my depression. I want to be a happier person, or at least someone who is content. I want to do things that make me happy rather than doing things because I feel I must or because I'm scared to stop doing them.

I still want to achieve my big dream and if I don't try now while my life is my own and I have few responsibilities, I will regret it.

So, figuring this out I have had to make a plan to sort myself out and my life, which I have. Don't worry, I'm not giving up writing. I wont stop writing or stop creating stories. Stories come to me so I believe I should write them. Why be gifted a story and an imagination if you don't use it or share them? I love writing. I love creating, but what has happened is - and I hate to ruin my mystique as an author - my day job, every day job I've ever had gets in the way. Since I started writing I have taken part-time jobs because I wanted the time to write and produce and publish books. I wanted the time and the energy to nurture my stories, but my day job ends up become my priority, and that's not right.

"Ignoring your passion is slow suicide. Never ignore what your heart pumps for. Mold your career around your lifestyle, not your lifestyle around your career."

I'm not 100% sure who said that or where I read it, but it stood out to me. Now, some people reading that will say, "it's not so easy." No it isn't. You need to be smart. You need to support yourself. We all have responsibilities. I have always been career orientated. When my friends were crushing on boys - and I did crush a little - I was dreaming. My career has always been important to me, and I am doing one fraction of it, but I am not spending my time or energy on my passion, and it is suicide. Every day I go into my day job I feel like my soul is curling up into a ball and slowly dying. That my sound nuts to you, but it's how I feel. I am bored, and drained, and fed-up.

So, I have made the decision to change jobs. I found a job that lets me choose what I want to work instead of being told what I'm working. I need a job because I have yet to write a big bestseller that will allow me to live off the royalties and write to my hearts content. So, until that happens, if it ever happens, I must have job. But my books are my priority. I want more time to write. It bugs me that I'm not hitting my wordcount every week. It bugs me that I can't manage to write two or more books a year for you all and myself. I said I wouldn't watch the progress of other authors and compare, but I can't help it. I don't write as much as I want for a number of reasons and it does bug me, but hopefully that will change and soon.

It is the lack of writing which means I don't write a lot of blog posts because I feel I have nothing much to say, but that's bad of me. Even if I don't have an essay to write I should still blog once in a while. So, I promise to start rectifying that. I promise I will try and write one blog every week or fortnight, but you will find I'm on Facebook more than anywhere else, and I might not say a lot, but I do post status updates more then I blog.

Being an author is one of my passions. Being an author, writing stories is my priority along with my big dream. Everything else has to fit in around them.

My big dream, which I'm keeping to myself, I am starting in this next month. I have a plan. I have a goal. This time next year I hope to reach that goal and then I will take the next step and then the next. It is a dream that - like being a writer - may take a while to lift off the ground, but I am determined to try and if I never get anywhere then at least I can say I tried. At least I can say I wasn't afraid to try.

I have no idea if I have confused or lost you, but to put it in a nutshell; I have been quiet the last few weeks due to make some decisions about the direction of my life. I feel better about what I have decided and I'm in the process of turning thoughts in to actions. And now that I have done that I can carry on with Blood Book 2, which I have unfortunately neglected due to feeling like utter crap and driving myself crazy these last few weeks.

On March 11th Blood 2 was up to 23.3k I haven't written anything since then. I have spent this last week reading through Cranberry Blood (Blood Series: Book One) to double check some things before I continue. I am still planning on releasing Blood 2 this summer. I tend to send my beta reader a chapter at a time, which I have already started doing so that when I finish the books, she will have almost finished the book and then I can edit and then send it to my editor. I find it easier to concentrate on individual chapters. It means I can tweak without having to go to far backward.

So far my beta is liking what she has read, which is great, but I am very aware that five years has passed between writing She-Wolf and Cranberry Blood and Untitled Blood Book Two, and I have to say I am nervous. From reading through Cranberry again I can see and hear how my voice has matured as a writer - which is a good thing - and I'm just kinda worried if that will ruin the story somehow. I don't think it will. The world is the same, the characters. The story is hopefully good and you will all hopefully enjoy it, but well, I'm an author. We worry about these things.

Anyway, I'm reading the last couple of chapter of Cranberry Blood tomorrow and then I am going to start reading from the beginning of Blood Two. So reading straight through from Book One to Two, and then I will crack on with the second instalment of the adventure.

Sorry for the rant, but even if it seems I haven't been somewhat absent these last few weeks I feel that I have and I felt it was only right to let you know why. And to update you on where I am at with Blood 2.

Thank you for your time, your patience, and your support.
You're all awesome! Have a fab weekend. :)

Elizabeth x

Wednesday, 25 March 2015

RBTL Tours: Desiring Death by C.P. Mandara


Title: Desiring Death

Author: C.P. Mandara 
Series: Evading Death (Book 1)
Genre: Paranormal/Vampire/Erotica
Publisher: Chimera Books UK
Release Date: Jan 22 2015
Number of Pages: 154
Word Count: 62,000
Edition/Format Available In: eBook


Blurb/Synopsis:

Violetta is an executioner… of vampires. Famed for her fiery beauty and mesmerising personality, she has never failed an assignment.

Monsieur Martinet is no ordinary vampire, though. He is a master at his craft and can control humans with the merest flick of his eyelids. The vampire huntress with the porcelain skin and flaming red hair has killed all of his brethren, without exception. He now seeks the ultimate revenge: her submission in HIS bed.

If he’s allowed to stay alive long enough, that is.


Book Links:
Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Goodreads

~ * ~

Excerpt:

 ‘You bit me,’ she accused, aghast, and her mouth was pulled back in a grimace of horror.
‘Oh, do keep up,’ he said with a tired sigh. ‘I pretended to bite you. That little morsel of fun happened only inside your head. The real thing is far better, and if you’re a good girl, I might even give you a demonstration.’ There was no accompanying smile after that sentence, and didn’t that say it all?
‘No, you bit me, earlier.’ Her voice was rising and sounded slightly hysterical. ‘My knife,’ she pointed to the blade below her feet, ‘is covered in blood. My shoulder stings. You bit me.’
‘Pumpkin,’ he sighed. ‘You’d know if I bit you. There’d be a post-orgasmic, flashing blue lights, shocked-at-the-brilliance of the world type of aura about you. All you’ve had is a knife plunged into your shoulder. If you’re hankering after a set of puncture wounds, though, I’m sure I can oblige.’ He used his index finger to beckon her forward and displayed a set of prominent fangs for her benefit. ‘It’s jolly good…’
‘Fine.’ She managed to get her trembling hands under control and she used them to smooth her auburn waves carefully around her face. Rearranging the long folds of her dress, which had become decidedly rumpled as she’d worn them dangling around her face for the duration of the spanking, she then took great care to pick up the knife by its unsullied handle and looked at it with displeasure.
‘You be a good girl and give it to your friends, now. You know exactly what will happen if you don’t, princess.’ He waved her back into the ballroom beyond, where a lively orchestral tune had just struck up. Her face turned to the lights streaming through the open doors and he knew she wanted to make a break for the safety of the walls within. She had much to learn. Nowhere would be safe for her anymore. In fact, safety would not be a usable word in her vocabulary from this night forth. ‘After you’ve finished with your death buddies, come back here and we’ll go party at mine. I’ll show you what you’ve been missing all these years.’ He unearthed his fangs again for good measure, and curled his tongue around a sharp point.
He knew she had to bite down the urge to scream at him. It would have been immensely entertaining had he not been coping with third degree burns.
‘You wouldn’t want to give me any hints or tips on how to remove that arrogant head of yours from your body, would you?’ Her voice held a simpering, sweet quality, and her little girl antics made him want to throw her down on the ground and cover her entire body with grass stains.
‘What can I say?’ He shrugged. ‘You’ll probably need to take a step over into the other side of life to find out though, precious. You’ll never kill me as a human.’
‘You’re the most vile and loathsome creature, I’ve ever met, Martinet. Using my fantasy was a low blow. Sexy stranger you may be, but you were hardly a knight-in-shining-armour. Next time you grope around for fantasies inside my head, make sure you do the job properly,’ she barked.
‘You came didn’t you? What more do you want? Rose petals and a fanfare? Tell you what, next time I’ll get out the horse and carriage and we can go for a proper ride…’ Martinet didn’t bother continuing. He was presented with her back as she stomped off and damned if she didn’t have a mighty fine ass to ogle.
‘Your performance was appalling, by the way.’ She did not raise her voice to utter the condemning statement, but she was well aware that she didn’t need to. What was it with women who always needed to get the last word in?
He cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled, ‘Good thing I’ll be getting plenty of practise in later then, isn’t it?’ He had to raise his voice quite significantly to make sure he could be heard by her inferior ears. No reply was forthcoming, but he knew she’d heard him by the stiffening of her neck and the tightening of her fingers.

~ * ~


Author Bio: 


Christina (C.P.) Mandara was born in the UK, but has spent most of her life travelling the world. She speaks three languages and has been chiefly employed in the fields of finance and travel. Her favourite city is Sydney and her favourite holiday destination is the south of France.

She loves keeping fit and enjoys running, cycling and water sports. No, not those kinds of water sports; think surfing or sailing. That doesn’t mean that she doesn’t enjoy BDSM in all of its glorious forms, be that pony girls, bondage, edge play, orgasm denial or a damn good spanking. Her favourite item in the toy closet (a box simply isn’t big enough) is her riding crop.

In her spare time she’s usually cuddled up with a good book, exploring the countryside or baking in the kitchen. In fact, she loves her kitchen so much she’s one of few woman who wouldn’t mind being tied to it! Her first and foremost love is writing, however, and more often than not you’ll find her on a laptop spinning tales of romance, erotica or dark, paranormal fantasies.

Author Links:
Amazon Author Page
Barnes and Noble Author Page
Blog {Blissful Blog}
Facebook
Goodreads
G+
Twitter {@naughtynell101}
Twitter {@cpmandara}

Other Works by C.P. Mandara


Pony Tales Series

Evading Death Series
Desiring Death (1)